How To Be More Authentic
Greetings Loved Ones,
This week we’re really zeroing in on the essence of authenticity. It's come to my attention that many of us have trouble actually knowing what authenticity feels like! What is it that makes you you? If you feel stumped here, you are not alone. I struggled with this a few years ago until I realized that clicking into your authenticity is really just a matter of:
DEFINING YOUR CORE VALUES -
What values do you live by? What makes you feel proud of yourself at the end of the day? What is your code of ethics?
Figuring out your core values will prompt you to dig deep and identify the principles that genuinely drive you. Think about moments in which you’ve felt most the most alive, most aligned, and most fulfilled. What other emotions were you experiencing in those situations? That will point you in the right direction (ex: compassion, generosity, courage, honesty). And then, take a look at the exact opposite of those emotions to get an even clearer idea of what your values are. What has caused you to feel violated or angry? It’s good to know what we don’t align with.
Note all of this, and then begin to narrow it down to the 3-5 core values that are truly non-negotiables for you. These will make up your personal North Star, informing your decisions, shaping the life you want to lead, and building your self-esteem along the way. This is the foundation of your ‘authentic code’.
YOUR WILLINGNESS TO BE VULNERABLE -
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Part of authenticity is vulnerability because vulnerability is honest and it's brave. The more honest you are, the more authentic you are. You could really use those words interchangeably. Remember times in which you’ve really opened up to another person. At times, it can feel absolutely liberating, and on other rare occasions, opening up might feel dissapointing if you don’t get the response that you want. Both experiences are equally important because no matter what comes of your willingness to be vulnerable, you are becoming more of a match to the people and experiences that are truly aligned with who you are at your core.
“Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it's having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage. To put our ideas out into the world with no assurance of acceptance or appreciation - that's vulnerability. To let ourselves sink into the joyful moments of our lives even though we know that they are fleeting, even though the world tells us not to be too happy lest we invite disaster - that's an intense form of vulnerability. The willingness to show up changes us. It makes us a little braver each time.
When we spend our lives waiting until we're perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make.” - Brené Brown
HAVING INTEGRITY -
Consistently doing what you say you are going to do. Integrity breeds trust within yourself and with your community as a result.
Integrity and authenticity are inextricably linked, forming the foundation of genuine self-expression. At the root, integrity is the unwavering commitment to your moral and ethical principles, which ultimately manifests in actions that align with your values (and thus, your happiness). Authenticity demands the truest representation of yourself.. because authenticity without integrity becomes merely a performance.
When we aim for integrity, we are aiming for a congruence between our thoughts and our actions.
"You don’t become confident by shouting affirmations in the mirror, but by having a stack of undeniable proof that you are who you say you are.” - Alex Hormozi
DEVOTING YOURSELF TO A LARGER PURPOSE -
…that is in service to the collective good. What is your WHY for doing what you do? How and why do you want to see the world change and what is your role in this?
Here, I invite you to write down what your Heaven on Earth looks like! If everything worked out best-case-scenario for our world, what would that look like? And what would your role be?
HAVING THE COURAGE TO EXPERIMENT -
The most authentic people are the ones who are willing to play with new ideas, fail gracefully, edit accordingly, and remain in a state of non-judgment along the way! Plus, the more you tune into your intuitive nature and create space (in meditation) for creative ideas to flow in, the more you're going to feel in alignment with your authenticity and the more self-compassion you're going to experience.
“Making your mark on the world is hard. If it were easy, everybody would do it. But it's not. It takes patience, it takes commitment, and it comes with plenty of failure along the way. The real test is not whether you avoid this failure, because you won't. It's whether you let it harden or shame you into inaction, or whether you learn from it; whether you choose to persevere." - President Obama
The journey to becoming your most authentic self is a journey back to wholeness.. it's one of curiosity, exploration, and expansion. It's perhaps the most important work we can do, to activate our truest nature, because the world so desperately needs it.. and, well.. you're going to be happier because of it. We need more embodied, honest, human beings in roles of leadership. We need the unleashed version of YOU.
I recorded a whole podcast episode on this for you where we go a LOT deeper! Episode #220 of The Lifted Podcast: Unblocking Your Authenticity.
+ To take your healing to the next level, you can book a 1:1 Alignment Session with me HERE.
